Is there a doctor in the house?

I know, still no dazzling art work or even update and yadayada. Noone reads this anyways (cept you, sweetie; Hi!).

Ive been doing double courses since 25th of Jan, moved around the 20th of Feb, having awesome sex meanwhile, and now Im apperently assistant in this research project (HUGE!) and Im not even close to qualified for it, but there ya go. Like dad said 'life's unfair, but sometimes thats your advantage'. So life, to put it mildly, has been somewhat hectic.

Nearly no social events, no beer, no money to spend on fun things or hell, even tasty things.
Just study, study, work, stress, work, study, study, (sexytime), work, eat cheap and close-to disgusting things. Makes Ed a dull girl, naturlich.

Cause, its like this; Ive had these periods of time before; no money and a lot of responsibility, youre not in control of your own time, and theyre fine, I can handle them... For two weeks.
Now we're pushing four, and this after (by my standards) a rough patch and I just-

I need to breathe. I need control over one morning or night, one without stress or thoughts.

Im not being friend enough, Im not being partner enough (where its needed), Im barely a daughter, Im just a student (coincidently quite low-ranking in the goverments eyes).
My mind, of course, thrives on this, and is currently indulging in weird dreams and thoughts completely unrelated to the matter at hand (school, if ya missed it) and Im telling you, Im not able deal with them in a healthy manner. Youre not helping!

Struggling with all these thoughts about possibly, maybe, being one of those I used to despise, one that everything seems to work out for (what if I am?) when I should be doing the dishes in my awesome "apartment", write my resumé and just get on with it - Now, I feel I came to a halt.
Its just Stop. Fuck.